February 16, Matthew
MATTHEW 5:21-37
Let me start with this story this morning. A new business was opening and one of the owner’s friends wanted to send flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card; it said “Rest in Peace”. When the friend found out, she became very angry and irate and called the florist to complain. After she had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry she was, the florist said. “Madam, I’m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this: somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, “Congratulations on your new location”.
As humans, we can do some very crazy things when we allow our anger to take hold of us. One of my favorite Aunts used to fill a bucket with water and swing it round and round and then let it go when she was angry. Thank goodness she did this outdoors. My guess is that most of us have done things when we were angry that we wish that we hadn’t done. Anger is a very human trait, but it can become very destructive if we let it burst forth on someone without thinking or hold our anger in until stress pushes us to the edge. Murder, adultery, divorce, and oaths, from our Gospel lesson today, all have heavy elements of anger associated with them.
Ephesians 4:26 tells us that, “Anger, managed correctly, can be an asset and not a liability.” That is, as humans we cannot avoid feelings of anger, but we can learn to control it and even use it in a helpful way. Anger can in fact push us to make positive changes in our lives. Proverbs 29:11 further tells us that, “A fool gives vent to their anger, but a wise person keeps themselves under control.” Notice that it says a wise person should not try to never become angry, but they should learn to keep it under control. In fact, if we suppress our anger instead of acknowledging and finding a way to let it go in a positive manner, it can affect our health and well-being. Usually it is our physical body that takes the hit. Anger has been known to produce heart attacks, strokes, high blood pressure, and several other things that none of us want to deal with.
We have all experienced anger at some point in our lives, and it can be a real problem if left unchecked. Though it starts as a harmless feeling, it can quickly grow into something dangerous that’s hard to control. The good news is that with God’s help, we can learn how to deal with our feelings of anger, and ultimately find peace, and furthermore, God is ok with us being angry with Him at times for they can also be times of spiritual growth.
Anger can take many forms. We probably all know someone that we describe as having a short-fuse. That is, they “fly off the handle” easily into a rage which is somewhat like throwing a cherry bomb in the midst of a crowd. Then there are those who are quick to become indignant and resentful when they believe that they have been slighted in any way. For example, in the story of the Prodigal Son, when the younger brother returned home and was welcomed and celebrated, the good, faithful son who had remained at home helping his father, was overcome with resentful anger. He stubbornly refused to let go of his angry and resentment towards his younger brother and his father, and refused to join in the festivities.
We can learn a great deal from the Bible about how we can handle our anger. Learning to deal with our anger in the way that Jesus taught and modeled during His time here on earth, can help us to live with more peace in our hearts. We can find strength in God to forgive those who offend us, to forgive ourselves, and to deal with our anger in a healthy way. Let’s take a look at what the Bible has to say about anger.
Matthew chapter 5 states, “I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. Settle matters quickly with your adversary” (Matthew 5:22-25). Notice here, that anger even disrupts worship. We need to recognize what has made us angry, and seek to resolve any conflict that has come from the situation before we worship. We can ask ourselves, “what is the most gracious and loving way I can deal with this issue and this person?” Because God forgives us all the time for our sins, we can certainly be the first to forgive others and show them the compassion that God shows us. It may not be fair for us to say that we are sorry first, especially if we were in the right, but because God does it for us, we can do it for others.
Likewise, Jesus tells us that we should not seek revenge when we have been wronged. Again, Matthew chapter five has good advice for us. “Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (Matthew 5:44-45). Use the situation to not get even, but to let God bring out the best in you and share the kindness of Christ.
Finally, we also need to be aware of those things that hook us quickly into anger.
Let’s listen to what Matthew 7:1 says. “Do not judge, or you too will be judged… First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” When someone has a speck in their eye it hurts. They need help getting it out. But you’re in no position to help when you have a log in your own eye! Once we are aware, it is easier to see where our anger comes from, and perhaps, even seek help in getting the log out of our own eye. Often someone we trust can help us work through the anger and see both sides of the situation.
As we leave here this morning, let us heed the words of James 1. My dear brothers, take note of this: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” Man’s anger does not fix anything, so STOP, LOOK, AND LISTEN before venting your anger on someone. Love one another as God loves us, for we are beloved children of God.
Amen